To Aussie or to Brit?
We recently had the pleasure of hearing firsthand an anecdote from one of our spritely writers on the legend of men from the land Down Under. She recounted to us a conversation shared with a new neighbour, over their 6ft fence, which began with innocently exchanging names and what-not:
“Well, I’m obviously Australian” our writer had laughed, knowing her accent had already been apparent when shouting ‘G’Day’.
“Yeh! I knew I heard something! Thought it was Kiwi though…” Threw back the fresh-faced neighbour, who was unaware of this clear hint that this Aussie has been living among the English for too long, her native tongue now fading.
More Neighbours marathons needed.
Then apparently, the conversation quickly led on to partners…
“My ex was an Aussie.” The neighbour had plainly stated. Silence. A little dog barks. And then, “He was a bit of a dick.”
Woah horsey. This is where we begin to tread on shaky ground. Do the two titles go hand in hand? Of course not, but we can’t help entertaining the idea that many men are walking, talking phalluses. That’s the thought we have to play around with today. If you had an Eric Bana and a Benedict Cumberbatch standing before you – one date is yours for the taking – who would tickle your fancy? Hulk or Sherlock?
It’s a thought that many travelling ladies will experience. Aussie larrikins compared to Posh Poms. Once upon a time they all came from the British Isles anyway. Only 200 years ago to hit the nail on the head, pre First Fleet. But on their respective islands and unique upbringings, two kinds of men have surfaced: the down-to-earth, sensitive new age guy and the approachable male driven by pride. Could you pin the country on which is which?
There is of course a reason that this Aussie guy once wooed that neighbour, possibly as a surf-savvy, sun-kissed, totally chilled out dude from the sunburnt country. Equally, there is a reason our writer has chosen to reside in the UK for a few years, (to grab a break from the relentless Southern Cross branded bogans back home?). After extensive research involving an in-depth case study of Hugh Jackman, combined with staring intently into the souls of our English male buddies, Janes can report that the only clear difference between an Australian and a British man is the way they pronounce ‘pasta’, their definition of what ‘footy’ is and of course, one place boasts Pendulum, the other produced Prodigy.
Chucking men in categories according to where they’re from isn’t the right way to go about this. We know. We’ve sinned. Although there are often personality differences between men from the outback, (bravado and beer, cheeky charm, tan-to-die-for and an affinity with livestock) and men from England, (well-spoken, open-a-door-for-a-lady attitude, orderly, partial to cider) – we prefer to simply look at them as people. With unique thoughts, feelings and a shared appreciation of Kylie Minogue’s figure.
But if we had a gun to our heads on making a decision… after seeing Les Mis, it would have to be Hugh.
**We’ve since delivered a jumbo jar of Vegemite to our writer to bring back her thick, handsome accent.